Showing posts with label rambling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rambling. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Inconsistency

Inconsistent. 


People don't like other people to be inconsistent but I think I've been inconsistent and treat this blog unfair. I already tell her to at least write on her everyday, or I will add some foodies stuff. But it seems none of it become any realization. Of course that followed with so many excuse (i.e; I'm tired, its late, ah I will do it tomorrow) and procrastination. Ahaha. 

I was think about it and I think it's getting worse. I delay do stuff that I think doesn't have deadline, like doing errands, or re arrange my room. Yeah now my room is a freakin mess cos of this procrastinating stuff, and DISTRACTION is actually my number one enemy. I feel i have this undiagnosed ADHD when i was kid. I'm so easily distracted. Like, if you talkin to me, you will realize i keep jumping back and forth to random topics. Some people say I'm interesting and not boring but some say "stick to this topic we talking about, will you?" LOL 

Bad, bad, bad. I know. Then again my friend will say "you being too hard on yourself" butbutbutbutttttt, I dont think I am. IN FACT, I think I PAMPER MYSELF SO MUCH with LACK of discipline (esp with my diet im soooooooo gluttttton), with my decision (I wanna do this but I can do that too, so i do this and that half each). I use to be a person with big determination and big will (yeah of course its also come with big ego). Now when someone having less ego, everything is flat and wavy. haha. Everything is so frickin flexible. 
Nothin to chase on, and also nothing to cherish on. Bad bad. 

As I realize it comes with my diet. I want to do this but my mind keep telling it there will still be TOMORROW. what is tomorrow? It's the day AFTER today!!! aaaaaaaaand, today is EVERYDAYYYY! Do you see how it become the devil circle? ahahha. Oh man, I'm 28 but still feel like a loser. Everytime I meet new people online and they say how they enjoying their life, and they're very passionate about what their work. Somehow some part of me dies everytime I hear that. How I waste my time. aot doin something I dont like. WAIT, why is this post become so emoooo? *slapself*  

Get up stand up and sit up! Eh I mean get up! and no no no no emo allowed! come one, where is that cheerful bubbly character that you used to have, mash? And you was and optimistic and not cynic girl. When did you become this gloomy grey colored sceptic and cynic girl? 

You can change yes you can! 

FOCUS and less distraction!

And as I write this post there is someone that suddenly msg me and sayin they know me from this blog! Waoo thats awesome. Becos this blog is practically almost like a tomb and I come and go writing it here. So Okay I decide, I will write post twice a week, and less boring which maybe will be filled with eithrd food pics or MY PICS MWAHAHHA. *slapped* 


PS: See how much this post describing how ADHD I am ahhaha. So frickin RANDOMMM. 



Thursday, August 30, 2012

Broke, totally.

Let me cry a bit, WAAAAAAAH! *silent scream* 
I just get my salary yesterday but today im officially broke. And the September not even begin yet!!! 
Why? Why am I broke? It was becos of my Bosses birthday, Friends birthday, and paying bills! 
And its all eating up all my salary. And now must strive for surviving the next month! Hahaha. Good bye skin care good bye nice food, good bye new things and oh damn! I forget to pay my cellphone bills!!!! *slaphead* Ouch dizzy now @__@

Today was a big headache in the office. Its always very hectic everytime Teddy (fyi. My Manager) isnt here. Today is his day off. And its ALWAYS hectic when he isnt here. Plus our director is coming to my office now. Directly from the central. Plus he is in bad mood! (as always, eh most of the time i mean) 

The rest of it is just lots of paper works.

Sorry for not showing up for two days!!! I was get back late in 29 august went to church that day and too exhausted to think to write anything. There is so much things I wanna write about. But end up not writing it when im in front of my laptop. After church, we (me, nessa and fungching) was discussing whats for dinner! Suddenly Vanessa said, lets eat paniki! (Here is paniki link in case you wondering) Paniki is a manado dish made from fruit consumed bat. BATMAN IN YOUR PLATE MWAHA. And superrrr HOT!!! If you said mexican chilli is hot, please try this one! IF you said the hottest dish is from thailand, please try this manado dish, You wont regret it even if you die when you eat it!! Hahaha. The bat taste isnt awful at all. Since Nessa never try it she is very curious of it, and so do FungChing. Apparently there is Manado restaurant near our church!! So here we are the three (food) musketeer, walking in adventure to look for this special hot spicy dish made from bat meat!!! And you know what, IT CLOSED. The place is closed at 9.00PM and we get there at 9.04PM. We late only for FOUR FREEAKIN MINUTESSSSS. But oh well what to say :/ 
So after that we discuss again what to eat and me and Nessa is so not interested with FungChing idea to go to KFC :( So we take the bus to go to the more urban place and eat char kwet tiaw. WITH SEAFOOD :( 

I dont have anything against seafood. I just not really fancy it. But i get to talk with Nessa alot even after we eat. Oh I also regreting to take cab to back home. It make me sick. The driver is driving LIKE HE CANT DRIVEEEEEE. HE SHAKING YOU LIKE THE SMOOTHIES IN THE BLENDER AND MAKE YOU THROW UP AS YOU GET HOME!! No seriously i was holding back alot for not making his carpet dirty while he drive so furious and shagging all the way!!!! Thats why i cant write my blog that day, too dizzy!!

And yesterday, I was just planning to go to the malls just for goto the drugstore buy some medicine for my gastric acid. And having dinner with fung ching. And I ask my sis where she is about. And actually she plan to transfer her gym membership to be mine so we went to the gym together. AAAAAAAAND the gym man said we cannot transfer it today. We need to be back again at 15. YOU WANT TO WASTE MY TIME 15 DAYS HUH? SO nice mr gym man!  
Plus my sis must pay one month for transfer it to my name and i also must pay one month worth money to get the name transferred. Regulation so robbing us! We still think abt it though. Ah thats not the point, the point is hang out with sis is: SHOPPING. With words of SHOPPING WITH YOUNG AGE WOMAN, you will know what i mean. I mean we gonna walk around the WHOLE malls, goin in and out the stores. Ans also lots of time in the dress room. Which isnt very nice for my tired body! And legs! Oh and feet! Okay i know Im an old woman, not as fit as my sis anymore ;__;  And the whining indication detected for the old woman ahahhahaha! *slapself* So that goes my two days without blogging. (hey im blogging it now anyway) 



Whats for todaaaaay? Today i ordering cake!!!!  Its for my Beloved Vanessa becos my Virgo best friend gonna have her birthday in September 1st!! :D Its supposed to be a surprise for her tomorrow at the lunch time! :D I hope she gonna like it!! I was planning to order a tiramisu cake! But they said they cant have it ready tomorrow!!! :( Bummer. I choose the tiramisu becos she LOVE coffee. But since it isnt available, so i order the mocca cake. Hope its good enough! ;__; Still a bit not satisfied becos i cant give her fluffy tiramisu cake in her birthday!! I hopeits gonna be a delightful surprise for her in the officeeee! *excited for tomorrow* Hehehe. Im still not having her gift ready though. I just happen to buy one item, but i dont think its good enough for a birthday gift. 

Oh this is the Tiramisu I want to give her: 
 Since its not available so i get this MOCA cake (will be with "Happy Birthday Nessa. Love, Macchi": 
THE TIRAMISU IS PRETTIERRRRR!!!! *sulk* Oh and i steal the pics from their site even they using java and flash wahahaha *evil*


And my other best friend is having a birthday few days ago. She gonna celebrate it tomorrow, all night long in the club. Too bad i cant come to her birthday bash since i need to be working in the next day. So i was asking what she want for this year dinner and she only said "ABSOLUT BLUE VODKA" and i was like errr arrite.... (fyi. Its not that easy to find liquor store here in Jakara, and clubs didnt sell it for take away home!!) So Im searching and asking friends who or where selling this item. And i get the contact and i contacting him. Arite done, gonna get that thing delivered tomorrow night!!! :D woohoo! Hope she gonna like it!!

So yah there it goes my salary ;___;  I hope its worth it! :D 


By the way, our duo blog is nominated to be the vertile blog in some other beauty blogs! Woohoo. And she ask us to write SEVEN random things abt ourselves. And i think I come lame. LOL. ANd with my broken english even! But i hope its fun enough to read :) (In case you interested here is our duo blog)  


And don't hesitate to follow and registering on my norimilk blog! ;) You login with your google, twitter, yahoo, aim, netlog, openid available!  

Thank You so much for keep reading my blog!! Hugs and kisses

Saturday, August 25, 2012

I. CANT. SWIM.

I never hate my self for being cant swim before. But now I do! I so do!!! 
I have an invitation from a friend to go and visit his resort in Mentawai Island. The place is like a paradise!! And its a heaven! You can swim, eat the fish and drink fresh young coconut. But the biggest problem is, I CANT SWIM!!! Why i cannot swim? Why Mother? Why Father? Why my parents never told me how to swim or maybe just push me to the pool when i was 5 so i can survive and be a good swimmer? (that was what my friend's dad do to her and she swim very well now). When I tell him that he was just laughing and sayin maybe i can ride on his back and he can swim. Okay... so I will be riding a dolphin? Interesting. 

Still very curious with the beautiful paradise island in mentawai, lemme give u some of the pics. Stolen from his facebook. Hehe :D 



Its so so so pretty rightttt? How can someone resist to not swimming??? In that pretty seaaaaaaaaa. BUT BUT BUT!!! KJSHAJKHAKHAOLHJASLJA:SJ!!! !
Now sure you understand why i hate myself for not be able to swim now! Huhuhu!!!! *cryariver* 

Now still looking for time when i can get to get there and taste the fresh fire flame grilled fish and fresh young coconut and play in the sand and touch the sea water with paradise like scenery!!! -Oh, without swimming. :( 

In case you're curious abt mentawai Island, Its near Sumatra Big island, Indonesia. Near Padang. err lemme get u some maps. Its actually a very good surfing spot! :D


Its here:

View Larger Map


And for some Info:  Wiki,mentawai.org,mentawaiislands

Hope the info is good enough! :D  


Starving in the midnight!

I knowwwww its a lame tittle! 
But its what im really feelin right now! I was home around six something. Taking bath and went back to my room maybe abt around seven. And, drop. Dead. Sleepin. I just wake up around 10. Starving. Haha, what a nice time to wake up, body!!! 
I just realize that im THAT tired. Or more likely exhausted! 
Ok now better im writing something on my blog than i do nothing i will end up craving something! >D 

I just finish my "The Are you REALLY open-minded? Test" And guess what result i get? TA-DA!! 

"Free Radical
You scored 70% Talk the Talk and 65% Walk the Walk!
You talk the talk, but you also walk the walk. You put your time, money, and efforts where your mouth is. It can be hard to be this open-minded both in theory and in practice... kudos!"

Im quite surprised actually! I never think im a Free Radical. I always think that im a liberal kind of type (The test is actually also include abt sex, political and religion kind of thing). 

And to be honest I failed to suppress my urge to eat. So i end up to cook eggs and heat up a Mediterranean beef stew. Was alright. It said no preservative  and no added msg. Not sufre abt that though. Now Im full and ready to sleep!! *smacked* 

So the title has been solved!!! 

Oh I actually have a new hair style. Err not actually new since its been a month now its a bit changed again. Must wait the next month and will get new haircut!! (again)

So lemme put SOME different hairstyle here ;) 




From This 







To this








And now is become like this after i cut the bangs!  ahaha 




I think its a tranformation for the better!! Dont you think so? :D
Plus I THINK I looks cuter *v* a bit of narcissism wouldnt hurt. hur hur hurrrr.

I actually have lots of things i want to write but the prob is, I always get excited and cantw ait to write but when i enter my room, i become a lazy HIPPO!!! And just wanna slump and dive to my bed and sleep and chill. *smacked*

Ok will try to post more fun and interesting things tomorrow! Haha . I doubt it though, but keep on crossing my fingers!! :D

See you later! *waves* 

Friday, August 24, 2012

Revive! 24.08.2012

I know now you wonder how many times i would reviving this blog right?  :( 
I know its been on and off for me to do my blogging things. Since i dont think that i have very interesting thing to write, yet when i have interesting things happen i forget to write it! *smackhead* 

I actually starting my blogging so i can have dedication of something routine, like blogging. But maybe my ADD personality is winning!! Haha. 


So today i have some spare time in my office. :) 
Was talking alot with soumeone in 3rd floor in my office, He is actually my senior but our work isnt really related so i dont get to talk with him alot. But yesterday, I had chance to know him better. And it happens he is sort of knowing lots abt meditation since he is learning karate for eight years, and I just try to gain some info abt meditation. Since, err idk when it starts but lately i got massive headache and have some gastric acid prob with my stomach. 

So I was so interested when he start to notice abt this kind of meditation, zen and stuff. But in my opinion his way of meditating is more like the "joy of living" thing. We also talking abt lots of another things like philosophy. And i was surprised its like what he talking abt is tickly my old self. Remind me abt how i was young, my vision and my mindset when i was young. And ho i was alwayg hunger abt knowledge and how i like abt those philosophy thing. 
We talked abt Sun Tzu, and how it can be applied among the corporation, as healthy war. And also talking abt The Three Kingdom a bit and more of that, MAHABHARATA!! It's actually kind of rare to have people who interested in those kind of thing. When we talk its actually 7 of us, But its only me and Mr Heru who actually understand and read and maybe know abt those things he talkin abt. So the conversation is kind of hot with me who is actually very excited haha. So we talk abt art, philosophy and culture. 
And it made me think, omg where have i been all this time? Why i keep think that im a stupid light headed and never think deeper anymore? And i admit in this past two years Im actually not very bright for reading situation or people, and not act quickly. Now i know the answer!

When i was changed to be more feminine, I somehow left my knowlege craving, intuition to learn more, somewhere i dont know where. And talking with Mr Heru is sort of making those old me rising!! 

And maybe for side effect, i got a massive headache before i went home and my gastric acid react (as usual if i was stressed or get under pressure). And i was very depressed last night that i dont want to go anywhere! But my sister keep nagging and ask me to go shopping with her. I was sooo depressed that i even cry for no reason and i dont know why. But today maybe i can answer that. Maybe there is side of me that regreting so many things and i feel that im wasting years of my life and i hardly improove to be a better human. In fact i always think that i become worst. But it isnt true. People Improove. Better or worse its all in balance. I think it was better in the past because i was so carefree and i dont have any responbility. Ok i did have responbility, but not as big as now. So maybe those things makes me worry to much. What gonna happen to me in future, what i gonna be? Will i be a better human, will i not? Can i make my mom happy? Will i find someone? And lots more things happen in my unconcious brain. And maybe somehow my head cant take thos overload thought at once.


Human is such an unique creature. Some emotional problem can even make u feel real sick and make you weak. And happiness can make you feel overwhelmed. But nothing last forever. The happiness and the sadness only there for a momment. Thats what someone told to me to not depend on anything. Because everything never last forever. Its actually a long nice conversation. Maybe i will try to talk abt it sometimes. When talking to him, its like he is sharing a little bit the secret of life with me. And his philosophy can actually makes us wiser if we can imparting to our life. :)

Im very grateful that in this past years i get to know awesome people who i can actually talk to and they really try to help me and not comforting me, but make me think deeper abt meaning in life. And i still remember this one person who i always contact when i m panic or just for rambilng, and he only say one thing "its okay, its all gonna be alright" I think its maybe he is understand abt we living in "the momment" and nothing last forever. Sadness will pass and not last forever, so does happiness. 

So now Im in my journey with controlling my emotion and not to be attached abt things i like or dont like. So i can control it more and see it with another perspective. So anything anyone say will not hurt me or make me too happy :) because yes, we actually just living at the momment. Which is hard for a very impulsive emotional girl like me. Haha Plus i get distracted alot. Focus, focus till i reach the zen. *smacked* 

Okay this is a very long ramble which isnt really interesting for a reviving a blog! Hahaha. See, i still got my impulsive thingy!! 

I promise my next post should be more fun!!! *crossing fingersss!!* 

Monday, February 13, 2012

Seasoning

Just wanna write what seasoning I have in the house now. Since i live alone in a studio apartment its not actually necessary having lots of cooking seasons. But yeah it seems i kinda like to buy it bit by a bit. And as i realize i have most of Chinese food season base. 


- Oyster Sauce
- Sweet Soy Sauce
- Salty Soy Sauce (not japanese type)
- Fish Sauce
Worcestershire 
- Salt
- Beef Stock
- Chicken Stock (powder, block and gel) 
- White Pepper
- Black Pepper
- Italian Pinch
- Extra Hot Sauce
- Palm Oil
- Olive Oil
- Vinegar (chemical vinegar)
- Furikake 


(Will add more later) 




I develop some trick of cooking, since there is lot of things I want to make but need oven. And I'm not own one, yet. Sob. :( 


Plus being so busy lately. Yeah i happen to have a job now. And live by myself again. Both happy or relieving and sad in the same time. And also a bit lonely.
Hope i can get new set of phone with better camera. My current phone's cam is sucks. Super sucks.
My previous one broken :( 
I hope things will get better soon! :D