Inconsistency

Inconsistent. 

People don't like other people to be inconsistent but I think I've been inconsistent and treat this blog unfair. I already tell her to at least write on her everyday, or I will add some foodies stuff. But it seems none of it become any realization. Of course that followed with so many excuse (i.e; I'm tired, its late, ah I will do it tomorrow) and procrastination. Ahaha. 

I was think about it and I think it's getting worse. I delay do stuff that I think doesn't have deadline, like doing errands, or re arrange my room. Yeah now my room is a freakin mess cos of this procrastinating stuff, and DISTRACTION is actually my number one enemy. I feel i have this undiagnosed ADHD when i was kid. I'm so easily distracted. Like, if you talkin to me, you will realize i keep jumping back and forth to random topics. Some people say I'm interesting and not boring but some say "stick to this topic we talking about, will you?" LOL 

Bad, bad, bad. I know. Then again my friend will say "you being too hard on yourself" butbutbutbutttttt, I dont think I am. IN FACT, I think I PAMPER MYSELF SO MUCH with LACK of discipline (esp with my diet im soooooooo gluttttton), with my decision (I wanna do this but I can do that too, so i do this and that half each). I use to be a person with big determination and big will (yeah of course its also come with big ego). Now when someone having less ego, everything is flat and wavy. haha. Everything is so frickin flexible. 

Nothin to chase on, and also nothing to cherish on. Bad bad. 

As I realize it comes with my diet. I want to do this but my mind keep telling it there will still be TOMORROW. what is tomorrow? It's the day AFTER today!!! aaaaaaaaand, today is EVERYDAYYYY! Do you see how it become the devil circle? ahahha. Oh man, I'm 28 but still feel like a loser. Everytime I meet new people online and they say how they enjoying their life, and they're very passionate about what their work. Somehow some part of me dies everytime I hear that. How I waste my time. aot doin something I dont like. WAIT, why is this post become so emoooo? *slapself*  

Get up stand up and sit up! Eh I mean get up! and no no no no emo allowed! come one, where is that cheerful bubbly character that you used to have, mash? And you was and optimistic and not cynic girl. When did you become this gloomy grey colored sceptic and cynic girl? 

You can change yes you can! 

FOCUS and less distraction!

And as I write this post there is someone that suddenly msg me and sayin they know me from this blog! Waoo thats awesome. Becos this blog is practically almost like a tomb and I come and go writing it here. So Okay I decide, I will write post twice a week, and less boring which maybe will be filled with eithrd food pics or MY PICS MWAHAHHA. *slapped* 

PS: See how much this post describing how ADHD I am ahhaha. So frickin RANDOMMM. 

Today is a bad day

Was actually write a freaking long journal abt what happen today, but after i think twice i think its not worth it to post it here so i delete it. 

Just today isn't really my day. I feel so tired and exhausted. And somehow regretting my decision to go back to my mom house. I would've keep living on my own. I feel like a loser now. I wish i have another chance to live  back alone. 

Maybe the thing is parent know which words will hurt you more. They know which knive that will stab deepest and they use it merely just to hurt your feeling. Okay maybe not yours, mine. Thats what usually happen in my life. 

Thats why i find it hard to get close with my parent, Which is funny i find that i feel like home when im with my best friends. Im actually a person that really love to stay in at home. But within my mom's attitude, i transformed to be someone who spending her most of the time outside the house. Which i found it isnt really nice. 

Sometimes i just need a simple "me" time. It feels like i dont wanna meet anyone or doin anything. But she just cant let me. 

Now i get a massive headache, since evening i just cant stop crying feeling depressed abt my situation. Which idk how to improve it. 

Maybe i should sleep now i hope tomorrow gonna be better!!! 

Good night! 

Starving in the midnight!

I knowwwww its a lame tittle! 
But its what im really feelin right now! I was home around six something. Taking bath and went back to my room maybe abt around seven. And, drop. Dead. Sleepin. I just wake up around 10. Starving. Haha, what a nice time to wake up, body!!! 
I just realize that im THAT tired. Or more likely exhausted! 
Ok now better im writing something on my blog than i do nothing i will end up craving something! >D 

I just finish my "The Are you REALLY open-minded? Test" And guess what result i get? TA-DA!! 

"Free Radical

You scored 70% Talk the Talk and 65% Walk the Walk!

You talk the talk, but you also walk the walk. You put your time, money, and efforts where your mouth is. It can be hard to be this open-minded both in theory and in practice... kudos!"

Im quite surprised actually! I never think im a Free Radical. I always think that im a liberal kind of type (The test is actually also include abt sex, political and religion kind of thing). 

And to be honest I failed to suppress my urge to eat. So i end up to cook eggs and heat up a Mediterranean beef stew. Was alright. It said no preservative  and no added msg. Not sufre abt that though. Now Im full and ready to sleep!! *smacked* 

So the title has been solved!!! 

Oh I actually have a new hair style. Err not actually new since its been a month now its a bit changed again. Must wait the next month and will get new haircut!! (again)

So lemme put SOME different hairstyle here ;) 

From This 

To this

And now is become like this after i cut the bangs!  ahaha 

I think its a tranformation for the better!! Dont you think so? :D
Plus I THINK I looks cuter *v* a bit of narcissism wouldnt hurt. hur hur hurrrr.

I actually have lots of things i want to write but the prob is, I always get excited and cantw ait to write but when i enter my room, i become a lazy HIPPO!!! And just wanna slump and dive to my bed and sleep and chill. *smacked*

Ok will try to post more fun and interesting things tomorrow! Haha . I doubt it though, but keep on crossing my fingers!! :D

See you later! *waves* 

Seasoning

Just wanna write what seasoning I have in the house now. Since i live alone in a studio apartment its not actually necessary having lots of cooking seasons. But yeah it seems i kinda like to buy it bit by a bit. And as i realize i have most of Chinese food season base. 


- Oyster Sauce
- Sweet Soy Sauce
- Salty Soy Sauce (not japanese type)
- Fish Sauce
- Worcestershire 
- Salt
- Beef Stock
- Chicken Stock (powder, block and gel) 
- White Pepper
- Black Pepper
- Italian Pinch
- Extra Hot Sauce
- Palm Oil
- Olive Oil
- Vinegar (chemical vinegar)
- Furikake 


(Will add more later) 




I develop some trick of cooking, since there is lot of things I want to make but need oven. And I'm not own one, yet. Sob. :( 


Plus being so busy lately. Yeah i happen to have a job now. And live by myself again. Both happy or relieving and sad in the same time. And also a bit lonely.
Hope i can get new set of phone with better camera. My current phone's cam is sucks. Super sucks.
My previous one broken :( 
I hope things will get better soon! :D